Today I wrote a letter to myself. One of those "you can do it" letters that I can read whenever I feel down. Nobody quite knows what I'm going thru except for myself so who better to get a letter from right? I read a few things that were particularly helpful to me tonight and put me in a very optimistic mood. And that was kinda hard to do considering I shaved off the rest of my hair today. Even though it was less than an inch long, it still managed to clog the drain in the shower more than enough times before I was finished bathing. Enough is enough. Dad shaved his head today. I guess he realized how real everything is and how terrible it is to shave your own daughter's head while she sobs like a little baby. He looks like his brother, Donny, now. Donny is a military man and a few years younger than my dad. The haircut combined with the Hoffman features made Dad look like Donny. Its actually a bit scary how close the resemblance is.

My cousin, Chris, has written me some very optimistic and encouraging letters. She has too been through chemotherapy and knows what its like. She also has a degree in pharmacy so she's really smart with drugs and things. I've never really known her because of the age and geographical gap but I'm glad to be writing to her. Writing to my friends and family has been great emotionally. Some days I just need to know someone out there cares enough to take a few minutes and write me a short email or letter. It means the world to me. If you read my journal and haven't been writing to me, you should!!!

I found something in a pamphlet I read today. It was very comforting:

"On your journey through the experience of cancer, you will inevitably
have times when you feel you don't have even an ounce of strength left to get
yourself through the ordeals of that day. When that happens, go ahead and
give it all up---to the faithful God who walks beside you every step of the
way. God will give you the strength you need to get through that day...
and the next... and the next .... and the next.... " -- Clair
Bradshaw